I CHANGED MY TEMPLATE ! :]spent hours on it ! but overall;
I'M SATISFIED! :D
sports day today!
was alright i guess
just that it rained :|
so had to wait for the rain to stop,
the track to dry and stuff before
the runners continued running!
we were running out of time
and as a result, cheerleading
was cancelled and postponned
to another day!
cheerleaders were pissed!
i would have been if i were in their shoes too.
they practiced really hard for it.
oh wells. stupid weather!
SHAKEIT!CHEER UP K BABE!
ILOVEYOUUU :)
anyways!
belle and i might be joining
yellow house cheerleaders?
HAHAHH! JOKEEES PLEASE!
yellow house did well!
i'm proud of ALL OF US!
we emerged as the champion house
for todays events (excluding cheer)
hopefully, cheer wouldnt pull us down!
I KNOW IT WONT! (:
yellow rocks! yellow rocks!
yellow rocks rocks rocks my socks!
:D
_____________________________________________
anyways!
i'm getting real pissed with a
certain someone. WAKE UP WILL YOU!
you think everyone around you is
changing! have you ever given a
thought that YOU are the one that
is changing!
sometimes i wonder, do YOU even know
the true meaning of a friendship?
you do NOT own anyone! if you can
have your own friends, why cant
others have their own friends too?
maybe everything would just be okay
if you change your fucking attitude
girl! not everything has to be done
your way. for once, just spare a
thought for others!
i can't believe you brought me into
this shit, and as a result you made me
loose my friendship with another person.
i dont get why you must drag me into
this with you, you know! i mean seriously!
does this even benefit you? are you happy
now? are you proud of what you've done?
seriously man! i think enough is enough!
ever since sec one, you wanted it your way,
you had it your way! but i think its time
to let it all go to an end. whats the point!
you are taking advantage of it! do you even
regard them as your friends? is this the way
you treat them? taking them for granted?
everything just has to be your way, so that
YOU are happy! but think about it, do you think
the other party is happy? friendship is like
a pair of hands! it takes two hands to clap!
both sides have to be happy! understand?
come to me, telling me you're sad that you're
drifting away from them. claiming to everyone
about it and all! for what?! i hate it when you
make it seem like everything is their fault
and NOT yours and NEVER will it be yours!
you claim that they have changed! what about you?
you claim that they have their new friends,
and they dont care about you. is that the case?
cos from what i see, its the other way round!
i think you should just fucking wake up! and stop
acting so pitiful and all. cos its not gonna work!
AND ANYWAY! THANKS FOR FUCKING UP MY FRIENDSHIP WITH HER,YOU
BITCH!
like you'll listen anyways.
URGHHHHHHH. FORGET IT!
off to the hospital tmr;
to check on my knee.
basically its getting worse!
i feel the pain more often now.
OH NO I HOPE ITS NOT SMTH BAD!
the school hols are over.
the school week have passed;
well at least for ijtp girls.
tmr's a holiday for us! why?
basically cos last years batch
did really well for O's! :D
havent been online for quite some time now.
so many things happening in my life.
ALL JUST COMES STRAIGHT IN A ROW,
ONE AFTER ANOTHER! and believe it
or not, i feel SO DAMN STRESSED OUT
AND AFFECTED BY EVERYTHING that has
been happening.
i guess the long weekend coming ahead
will be a really opportunity for me to
relax as well as to rest, since i've
been REALLY SO TIRED that nowadays,
i can hardly open my eyes in the mornings,
after getting up from bed. i guess its
cos i havent been getting enough rest
for the past few days.
basically also! my kneee is kinda
becoming worse, although i do take
the medicine as prescribed by the
doctor regularly, wear my knee guard,
rub the oil onto it (as the doctor says)
before i sleep etc. but it hasnt shown
any sign of improvement yet, in fact
i can feel it becoming worsee! HOW?!
monday, played bball during recesss with
ms teo, chingg and shayna even though
i was NOT supposed to.. ALLLLEEELLLUUIIAA!
that was how it started becoming worse!
i told ms teo that standing and shooting
shouldnt be a problem, and guess what!
she allowed meee! :D
ching and shayna vrs ms teo and i.
i was supposedly supposed to do all the
shootings while ms teo do the runnings,
layups and stuff. but one point in time
during the game, i seriously couldnt
help it but do a layup. felt good running
abit, but then it hurt hell of ALOT after
that. i couldnt do a proper layup, couldnt
play the game well as i couldnt run fast
enough to catch most of the rebounds,
passes and stuff with my knee in this
condition. that feeling SUCKED BIG TIME!
was quite upset and affected by it.
after school, stayed behind for training
with sher. watching the rest train,
wondering when will you ever get
the chance to ever get back on
court to train with them.
believe it or not, that kinda
feeling sucks. i'm so scared!
its like i dont even know when
this knee of mine will fully
recover. i seriously dont want
it to affect my training.
also while sitting with sher!
we were supposedly supposed
to study, but guess what! we
cleared all the misunderstandings
and stuff, talked about whatever that
was troubling us, and also all the shit
that has happened so far.
we then found out who was actually
the one behind all this shit!
i really couldnt understand
why i had to be dragged into
this, and as a result i lost
my friendship with someone
else.
but anyways!
glad i caught so many things up with sher,
and got to know her so much bettterrr!
i'm glad we cleared everything, and got
to tell each other our true feelings inside
and stuff like that. i like totally let
everything out, so did she :D
AND SO ANYWAYS! I LOVE SHERYL ALEXIS KOH XUE ER!
REMEMBER! NO RUMOURS WILL EVER BRING THIS
FRIENDSHIP DOWN AGAINNN! :D
SHER I WANT GREEN TEAAA! -POOOOOOMMMMM- hahah.
(personal joke between the both of us in case
you dont get it! hahhah!)
MMWAAAAAHHHHHHH*
i was damn pissed that very night also.
basically cos i was touching up my geog
presentation which would be graded as
our CA marks by mrs kunna the following day.
and besides it was individual work.
so added an additional of twelve slides
into my geog powerpoint and guess what!
my stupid com just decides to shut down
on its own w/o saving the file. OMG!
SO I STAYED UP ALL THE WAY TIL THREE PLUS
JUST TO REDO ALL THE SLIDES ALL OVER AGAIN!
and guess what! mrs kunna decides not to
turn up for lessons the following day!
goodness me! itellyou. i was super pissed!
today my IPW group got into massive
trouble with our FM as well as DM.
i could feel all the stress coming
down hard on me, especially since
i was the group leader. i felt so
ashamed of myself, and that i was
such a bad example as well as a
DAMN LOUSY leader.
the worst part was we lost the trust
of our FM. i could feel it so hard;
the stress from everyone. i just
broke down. maybe i should just
give up my position to someone
who might be better off in the group
anyways.
no matter how hard our group
tried to explain, no-one just
wanted to believe us; that
we really had NO INTENTION
at all. oh well.
i really feel like giving up.
I'M REALLY SO TIRED!
iloveyou'll.
connie, sarah, bernice, nat and calli.
everythings gonna be alright.
i'm sorry! i'm not perfect.
my exams are in
22 days time.
i feel THE STRESSS!
do you feel it?
OH MY! JOYYYY!
ilove MY PINKY!
non other than sherylkohxueer :D
friday, had lenten vigil in church
in which we were required to stay up
the whole night. i actually managed
to stay up, although it was SUPER
DUPER COOLLLDDDD! seriously cold.
everyone was totally freezing! and
i forgot to bring along my sweater
so had to borrow from darren since he
didnt need his. borrowed all the way
until seven plus in the morning. oh wait!
and i thought i could have stayed
awake, but then i kinda knocked out a
lil during masss! wooopps.
throughout the night, we did different
activities like stations, passover meal,
watching and understanding the passion
of christ etc. also, throughout the night,
my dear claire chua and i kept using the
passion play costumes as blankets as it was
really EXTREMELY COLD! as we were watching
the video on the passion, that girl was using
me as her pillow and sleeping! hahah.
GREAT! i'm not allowed to train, to have PE
or have any physical activities for a month!
besides all these bullshit, i still have to
put on a knee guard for the whole month too!
i supposedly tore my ligament or something
like that, thats why its hurting so badly.
the doctor told me if i go play some games
within the month, it would be at my own risk.
she also added that my knee needs ALOT of rest
now, cos i overexerted it too much with my games.
HOW MUCH OF REST WOULD IT POSSIBLY NEED, DAMMIT! one whole freaking month of not training! OMG! then i realised how bad it actually was when she told me that by one month, if the knee still doesnt heal, i might have to undergo an op.
i'm gonna miss training! i'm gonna miss it so much! ARGHHHHHH! SCRRREEEEWWWW MY KNEEEEE! i just hope it heals fast, so that i'd be able to start training hard for the competitions!
injured my knee last week
while i was playing bball.
never happened before through
the many years that i was in
netball as well as in basketball.
refused to go to the doctors to
have it checked as i thought it
would be okkay after leaving it
to rest for a few days. and
besides i was so scared to get
refered to the hospital, and have
to undergo some operation or smth.
i also didnt want the doctors to
tell me that i have to lay off all
my games cos if that is the case,
OMG! i'll just die please!
but now it seems like i really have
to be sent to one. going to the
hospital tmr morning, that means
i'll not be going for training!
FUCK! my attendance!
so much for making my promise
that i'll attend every training
from this year onwards, as well
as train hard for the competitions.
but now, i dont even know if i'll
even be able to ever go for training
from tmr onwards. i dunno why but
i'm just scared. damn scared.
i thought everything was alright.
so on sunday i made my way down to
play bball with cl. halfway while
playing, the pain came back again.
but i just continued playing.
earlier on, played bball again with
my sisters. just did some slight
passing, and catching, and then it
hurt like hell. now how bout this-
i can hardly walk now, cos my knee
is still pain! DAMN BLOODY PAIN!
thats why i have no choice but
to be sent to the hospital
tmr morning to check on it!
fucking scared.
i'm tired of listening
i'm tired of explaing
i'm tired of trying
i'm tired of crying
i'm tired of
you my tears have run dry.
under major huge depression
is no laughing matter.
never would i have imagined
that i thought that
sucidalwas the only solution that could
solve all my problems.
funny how the teachers had to
accompany me here and there in
school on friday just to make
sure that i dont do anything silly.
under counselling in school
right now with ms teojl.
dunno how in the world
am i gonna let her find
out about all thats been
troubling me these few weeks.
but one things sure is that shes
definitely gonna get it out of
me somehow.
anyway!
i would like to say a
huge thank you to all those
who have been there for me,
trying to put the smile back
onto my face, as well as for
being the railings i was
holding onto while falling.
esp to my darling SHAKEIT!
and sheila! i really wouldnt
have known what it would have
been like w/o yawl, seriously.
i love the both of you so damn
much pleasee! MMMMWAAAAAHHHHH*
WHAT THE HELL DID I FUCKING DO NOW?!
LISTEN HARD! I AM TRYING SO HARD TO
MAKE THIS FRIENDSHIP WORK OUT AGAIN,
BUT NO, YOU JUST HAVE TO FUCKING LISTEN
TO ALL THE FUCKING RUMOURS WHICH IS GOING
AROUND ONE BY ONE, AND GOD KNOWS WHETHER
THEY ARE EVEN TRUE! WHY?! I'M NOT ONE MAKING
THINGS HARD HERE! I DONT WANT THIS FRIENDSHIP
TO GO DOWN JUST COS OF ONE STUPID MISUNDERSTANDING;
YOU FUCKING GET IT! BUT YOU JUST HAVE TO LISTEN
TO RUMOURS RUMOURS RUMOURS... ANYTHING BUT RUMOURS!
I FUCKING HATE IT! ARE YOU VERY CERTAIN IT CAME
FROM ME? SO MANY THINGS I HEARD, BUT I JUST KEPT QUIET!
AND I DIDNT EVEN WANT TO BELIEVE IT OR ANY SHIT LIKE
THAT, COS HOW WOULD I FUCKING KNOW WHETHER THAT WAS
WHAT YOU REALLY SAID, OR REALLY MEANT! ITS NOT MY FUCKING
FAULT IF YOU CHOSE TO LISTEN TO THOSE BITCHES RUMOURS!
JUST IN CASE YOU DIDNT KNOW! I NEVER EVER DID SAY I WAS
JEALOUS OF THE BOTH OF YOU OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT! ANYWAY!
WHY SHOULD I BE! AS YOU SAID IN YOUR BLOG BEFORE, I'M
ALWAYS INTERFERING IN YOUR FUCKING LIFE! DO YOU THINK
I WOULD BE SO STUPID, AND TELL EVERYONE, OH! I'M SO JEALOUS
OF THE BOTH OF THEM AND WORSE STILL, ASK THEM TO FUCKING
SPREAD IT AROUND! OMG HELL NO! I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW THAT
RUMOUR STARTED OUT! NO-ONE FUCKING HEARD ME SAYING I WAS JEALOUS
OR WHATEVER EVER SINCE THE BAND CONCERT NIGHT!
JUST GO AHEAD, LISTEN TO ALL THOSE FUCKING RUMOURS! LISTEN LISTEN
LISTEN FOR ALL I FUCKING CARE OKKKAY! I MADE YOU LOOSE ANOTHER FRIEND?
WHAT THE FUCK! LISTEN HARD! IT WAS YOU WHO MADE YOURSELF LOSE THAT FRIEND
OF YOURS! YOU CHOSE TO LISTEN AND BELIEVE ALL THOSE RUMOURS! SO IZZIT MY
FUCKING FAULT?
I HAVE SAID ONCE AND I'M GONNA SAY AGAIN.. WE BOTH NEED TO TALK THINGS OUT!
LISTENING TO THOSE FUCKING RUMOURS WOULDNT SOLVE ANYTHING AT ALL! I WONT GET ON
WITH MY FUCKING LIFE UNTIL I'VE RESOLVED THIS MISUNDERSTANDING! I AM NOT GONNA LET
THIS FRIENDSHIP GO DOWN ANYMORE, YOU FUCKING HEAR ME! I WANT TO TALK THINGS OUT WITH YOU!
AND SO.. THANKS FOR FUCKING UP MY HOLS!
WELCOME TO MY FUCKED UP LIFE!
everything seems to be going
wrong for me all at one shot.
family, school, friends... everything!
I'M SO FUCKING STRESSED UP!
SCARS SCARS SCARS SCARS!!!
FUCKING SCARS!
shoutouts to all my darlings;
SHAKEIT thanks for always making time to always be there for me whenever i need someone! i miss you so damn much! you are one person i'll never ever forget! my one and only shakeit! iloveyouso damn much! MWAHHHHH*
DONN! i missed those times sitting right next to you last year! miss you so much la. you and all your nonsense i tell you!
PARTNERR! OMG! the bestest partner ever, seriously! thanks for always being there whenever i needed you. want you to know that i'm always here for you too, no matter what! love you truckloads PARTNER! (:
JASPER BABY!i miss you so much baby! lunch sometime soon again yeh! MWAAAAAAHHHHH*
PRESTY! I TELL YOU! I MISS ALL YOUR NOISE IN CLASSSS! it feels so weird w/o you now. i havent talked to you for quite some time. damn, i miss you hell of alot! just wanna let you know that i'm always here, and i love you SO MUCH; SO DAMN MUCH!
VANESSA! my closest friend for the past six to seven years! i miss you and all your jokes! we have catch things up sometime soon yeh! iloveyou VERY MUCH, and you know that! thanks for being an awesome friend! :D
last but not least...
DOTT! i'm sorry for all that has happened. i hope we can really talk things out, and resolve the misunderstandings between ourselves! but still, no matter what, i want you to know that i'll always regard you as my DOTT. always.
I MISS YOU GUYS TRUCKLOADS! ):
